(Probably more correctly, “Odious Ego” 🙂 )
This morning I ran a ten words writing exercise (briefly – write ten words that “bubble up” without intentionally thinking about them, write a sentence that “bubbles up” for each word, and then look for threads which pull the sentences together). Today’s exercise clearly spoke of the ego, the thinking/judging voice of separation:
Deceptively calm seems the surface of the lake Yet just below there's a frenetic and fractured scourge of thinking Terrified at the horror, the loss of identity, in connectedness, Missing entirely the truly awe-inspiring, the majesty. in stillness. Fickle fancy, flittering capriciously, Then petulantly, peevishly needing more, insatiably. Laboring to exaggerated proclamations - gorgeous! When within the sumptuous banquet in Beingness awaits.
The hardest work for me is processing – acknowledging and giving over to God – the insane ragings of the ego. For those of us who looked for truth in thinking, hearing the faint, faint voice of the mind, the will, is a challenge. But the deepest part of me knows God did not make the world I’m experiencing, so what else could have set this in motion? The answer so many enlightened ones have discovered, that A Course in Miracles so patiently and methodically exposes is that – I AM, the cause. The collective thoughts of a seemingly disconnected and fractured Son of God is the cause, and the experience is the effect.
So, in faith that those who truly seek the truth cannot fail, I continue